PRACTICE MAKES DONE
Welcome to DATA + FEELINGS.
Welcome to DATA + FEELINGS. The name will almost certainly change again. But for now, it feels both vague and specifically me enough to do.
I have been struggling with the purpose of writing. I took a class with adrienne maree brown (through the incredible Rec Center) where she asked us where we found pleasure in the writing process.
I find pleasure in selecting the best words in the best order. That’s the first thing I wrote. Choosing precise language to communicate, evoke a feeling. But then I thought about all the times I published an article and then felt empty afterward, and then noticed: I get pleasure out of generation. Of sparking discussion. Of seeing reactions and creating connections and sharing that in others. I love to give the gift of being seen. I also write to understand; the words flow through me and a messy dysregulated body becomes calm and cool and settled when I put my pen down.
Sharing is difficult. Many people struggle with this. It’s been interesting and somewhat silly to see what my blockers have been: I have the eternal artist’s struggle of having an image of what I want to execute in my mind, but not the skills to bring it to life the way I want.
I made a very cute reel all about morning routines. I took a few minutes to write out what I wanted to say, edited some pictures together, recorded myself speaking, went down an hour-long rabbit whole trying to remember the name of a song, edited the script so it was short enough to be read out loud in a video, wrote out subtitles, wrote out an instagram caption, picked beautiful emojis and hashtags and posted it. And my whole caption was lost when it posted. I deleted in frustration and gave up for the day.
I’m going to post it again this week. I saved the video, at least. I wrote a good caption once, I’ll write it again. Live and learn.
Practice doesn’t make perfect. At least not for a long time. Practice makes done. This is me practicing.
I’m going to experiment with a few sections of the newsletter, to see which are the most fun.
Internal family systems theory. I’m currently reading *Wild Mind* (h/t Daje James) and No Bad Parts at the same time. I usually listen to them while walking Symmetry, at 1.3x speed. Both books deal with internal parts of ourselves, how we literally contain multitudes, how we are not a single personality. I first heard about IFS from my therapist, and naively thought it was a therapy technique for dysfunctional families...or something. Learning more about IFS from its developer has helped me understand what influenced the theory, and in which situations it could be beneficial for me.
I got a copy of Next World Tarot a few weeks ago after having admired the images for several years. I always love seeing how different artists interpret the same prompts; which parts of the original artwork resonate with them, how they break or repeat common card meanings. The edition I have has a keyword on the bottom of the card, and I don’t love that as it distracts me from developing my own understanding. I love the artwork and how some cards are reframed — e.g. “The Tower” is now “Revolution.”
Color. Purple is my favorite color. The preference is practically hereditary. I keep switching up the colors on my website, and for the first time since I made my website back in 2015 there is no purple to be found. (Any you may spot is a result of poorly organized CSS.) I’m excited to learn more about color this week as Lise Silva’s color workshop begins. My favorite zine from a Femme Filth Press assortment was Karina’s meditation on pink. I’m looking forward to finally cracking open Color & Human Response which I inexplicably bought at a used bookstore several months ago. I guess I know why now.
I made my first set of bitters this week. I’m taking them before meals to see if they help with digestion. I wrote down the recipe and it’s a hodgepodge of what was laying around the kitchen and small bits of herbal knowledge. The concoction is ORANGE and reminds me of sunshine.
I have a few stories coming out at The 19th this week. One already published. Subscribe to our newsletter to stay up to date. We have a daily digest as well as a weekly column — you can pick whichever matches your pace; just reply to the first email after you confirm your subscription. Full disclosure, I used my unique share link because whenever someone signs up it sends a message to our company Slack saying I referred them. It is nice to show my coworkers that the people I care about care about what we do. 💜 Also, maybe we’re a liiitttle competitive about it.
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I’m still figuring out the cadence of the newsletter. I’d love to know which sections of newsletters are your favorite.
All my love,